run run run..

There's never enough time in the day (or night for that matter). All you ever do is go to work/school, come home and take care of the family/do homework, and then have to go to bed. Then try throwing a sport into that, where you get run down all week, then have games during the weekend. I like being busy, but getting so worn out is hard. I find myself only wanting to sleep. and then I think, I actually get the chance to do these things. So many people in the world haven't even ridden in a car, while we sit here and do everything we can to convince our parents to get a car for our 16th Birthday. (which might I add is pretty ridiculous). I want to slap myself in the face every time I complain about something, when I could very well not have anything at all. And I praise God for giving me such an amazing life. It's so hard not to get sucked into the world.
And when people (including me and I'm pretty sure everyone has done this..) only talk about themselves. They have to relate everything to them and be the center of attention. I HATE that. Sometimes I just want to scream at them to shut up and look at the world around them. After that if they're still selfish enough to talk about themselves they have some serious searching to do. I've fallen into things like this before, I can't help it, I'm only human and not even close to perfect. But the coolest thing is that Jesus is. He came to this marvelous God-made, sin-stricken planet and made it without sinning once. EVER!!! meaning never ever ever ever ever! Not in his entire life as human. Why is it so hard for us to live this way? But God is the one who is truly all-knowing. We can't understand anything compared to Him. This is one of my favorite things about my relationship with God. Sure sometimes it can be frustrating, but the fact that I can put my total and complete faith in Him, but still know that he will NEVER let me down is incredible! I can't even begin to explain..well, anything. For all I know I could break my finger writing this blog. But God is the one who really knows. Every twitch of my nose to every hug of a friend. That's why I'm leaving my life to the indescribable I Am.

a different world

last weekend I went to Jamaica on a mission trip. The thing I noticed most was the difference in lifestyles. I've been on trips before to poverty stricken places, but the shock follows behind you every time. The houses were no more than drift wood and old tin found lying on the ground. Their homes no bigger than two bathroom stalls, are slowly rotting away.
Most women grow up thinking they have nothing else to do in life than have kids. She gets pregnant, usually before she even turns 18, starts trying to raise this family, by herself, because there's no way the fathers going to come help, he already has three other families he should be taking care of why would he help her. That would mean he'd have to take care of everyone else too.
You can just see the cycle repeating generation after generation. I just want to steal all the little ones away, before it's too late, and teach them there's more to life. It breaks my heart to know where they're going.
But then you meet people like Violet. A wonderful woman fully devoted to God and her community. She's simple, but tries so hard to teach her family that there is more. At the church services she just belts it out, "Praise Jesus! Praise Jesus! Hallelujah, Praise Jesus!" over and over again. Violet glows, inside and out. She's a rock not to be moved into the stream of reality. Only to be left to disappear into sand like everyone else.
It's people like Violet that give you hope for the others. The ones who have given up on life. The one who think, "I'm done for anyway, why try?" They don't have to throw they're life away. They have a chance, but just need someone to show them.